Olympic ephemera

• Watching the men's hockey has been tremendous, and it all culminates in today's gold metal game between the USA and Canada. Regardless of the outcome, you couldn't script a better scenario. However, after seeing the Canadian public's bout of clinical depression following the last loss to the USA, I have a feeling the country will go the route of Jonestown and drink the Kool-Aid if The United States wins again.


• Boner from Growing Pains is dead. While I'm going to refrain from any of the innumerable dick-jokes I could come up with and pay respects to the dead, I am going to question the producers of the show. How did they manage to name a character Boner on a wholesome family show? Was there no irony in the 80s? It would be akin to naming a character on a Disney show "Come-Shot" or "Dirty Sanchez," which happens to be the nickname many of us Patriots fans use for The Jet's quarterback Mark Sanchez.


• Mike Lowell really is a stand-up, articulate guy. Part of me is pulling for him to have a big spring and shake-up the squad. Doubtful, but I'd love to see it.


• While the Opening Ceremonies brought us Bryan Adams and ice dicks, I wonder if the Closing Ceremonies tonight will bring us The Barenaked Ladies singing "If I Had a Million Dollars" for all the endorsements the Olympic champions will have coming their way. Maybe they'll have giant ice boobs this time. Nice.


• Kevin Sampsell's A Common Pornography is one of the best memoirs I've read in years. If you haven't already, you should pick up a copy. Rock on, Kevin.


• It doesn't seem like Lyndsay Vonn and Julia Mancuso are going to resolve their dispute with a Sapphic kiss. Son of a bitch!


• On that note, I think I figured out, specifically, the male allure to watching female figure skating, and it has to do with having the complete, unobstructed view up their skirts. It's almost too easy. Almost.


• (above) Beckett and Lester and Lackey, oh my! Beckett and Lester and Lackey, oh my! Wake me up, Dorothy. I must be dreaming.


• Have you listened to Deer Tick? You should. They're a band from Rhode Island, and only good things come from Rhode Island. Think me and Pauly D.


• Let me amend that so I don't include the Central Falls superintendent and the State Education Commissioner. They suck.


• Baseball is right around the corner. Amen.


• Go Team USA! Kick some Canuck ass today.